An open letter to me when I was 19....

Recently, my best friend sent two pics of me she found in a random box from our college days. From the fashion and hair I'm dating them in early 1990's. Oh the things I wish I could tell the innocent 19 and 20 year old me, things that still apply to today's college students.

Yes I know today's world is much different than it was when I was in college.The hair and the jewelry are not as big and the world is digital and instant.  But the basics are still the same. So, what would the "mom me" tell the "college freshman me" with 27 years of perspective?

1. Trust your gut, if the situation doesn't feel right, walk away, and walk away quickly. Things can change in an instant, do not be at the wrong place at the wrong time.

2. Always have a friend or two you can trust. If you have one friend you can trust, keep that friend. Go to a party with that friend and leave with that friend. Never leave anyone behind. Make a pact and keep it. Do not ever leave anyone behind no matter what they say. Make a plan at the beginning of the night and stick with it.

Trust me on this one, do not leave your friends behind no matter who they are with or what they say. Stick with the plan. If you don't things will happen that you can not explain but you also will never forget.

3. Do not leave your drink unattended- ever. Hold it at all times and if it is out of your sight then just get a new one. It's that simple, the risk is not worth the potential consequences. If money is the problem your one true friend will always understand and I promise your mom will too, just talk to her.

4. Remember you are a work in progress, the freedom is great but you are just beginning. Don't be so hard on yourself, you are learning. Never forget who you and whose you are. Stay in touch with the people who have always believed in you and hold to tight to what you believe.

As my first born son heads to college in a few weeks I hope he remembers these four things. They are simple and basic and my years put them in crystal clear perspective.

"So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don't fall! No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it." 1 Corinthians 10:12-13

Grace and Peace, 
Misty 

When you are "fatherless", Father's Day is tough....

I'm a fatherless daughter. The reality of that hit me smack in the face early in the morning of November 18, 2015, it was less than 24 hours after I turned 45. My baby brother called me while he walked in the rehab facility where my dad was and we both heard the nurse say he was gone.  God called my dad home in the early morning hours afters after my birthday.

Thanks to my little brother, my dad called me that morning. He greeted me with all the energy he could surmise and he said, as he did for every birthday I can remember, "Happy Birthday Tina Marie!" Those were the last words I would hear from him and I'm grateful I heard them.

So, Father's Day, the week leading up to Father's Day, the card aisle at Walgreens, the TV commercials, I hate them. To put it bluntly, they suck. Father's Day is tough and I know I am not alone.

Some of you don't know your dad at all. Others have a toxic relationship with your dad. Maybe you feel abandoned that he left when you were young. Some are experiencing their first Father's Day as a "fatherless" daughter or son. Maybe it's the 10th Father's Day you are spending without your dad. Or, perhaps you haven't talked to your dad for years for reasons you can't even remember. It all adds up to the fact that it's a lonely day, a sad day, and a day to endure.

This is my second "fatherless" Father's Day and it's not as painful as last year. I don't know why. As I have said before, grief is a nasty beast. You never know when it will attack. Last year, I could not walk down the card aisle at Walgreens; it literally knocked the breath right out of me. This year has not been as bad. Thursday was hard, I was "out of sorts." You know the feeling, nothing seems right. Then I remembered it was the Father's Day week, and nothing would ever feel "normal" again. After a loss, you are different.

I have remembered a lot today. He did everything BIG, he was bigger than life. I remember his smile, his laugh, his love for his children and grandchildren, his love for his mom and brothers and sisters, his love of good food and a cold drink. But mostly God has reminded me that he is my Father. He was my first Father and my forever Father. He will never leave or forsake me. I love this Bible verse, it's a great reminder.

God will never leave you, abandon you or forsake you. He is the greatest

Father you could ever have. If you too are feeling lonely today, I encourage you to talk to your Father. He is waiting. He is there. All you have to do is say hello, He knows your voice. He knows your pain, He will heal your broken heart.

Happy Father's Day in heaven Pops. You will forever live in our home and in our hearts. I can not imagine the celebration you are having with your heavenly Father and your dad today. Thank you for loving us BIG!!!!

#luvlivebig

Grace and Peace, 

Misty